A 45-point win, and somehow Dave is still mad.

I am going to start with this because apparently I have to say it slowly for the people in my mentions. Yes, Michigan State won 45-0. Yes, that is better than winning 24-13 and pretending it was a “teaching moment.” Yes, the young quarterback looked pretty good. Fine. Congratulations. Hang the banner. “Did Not Embarrass Self Against Grambling State.” Put it right next to the 2015 Big Ten title.

You are physically incapable of enjoying anything.

No. I am capable of enjoying things that mean something. I watched this fan base get gassed up by opening games before. I watched people convince themselves after one clean Saturday that the demons had left the building. And then October came around and the demons were in the kitchen making coffee.

It was a first game. You wanted them to look organized. They looked organized. You wanted Hannan not to melt. He didn’t melt. You wanted the best player to look like the best player. Cam Edwards did. What are we doing?

We are doing perspective, Marcus. That’s what we are doing. Because I know how this goes. By Tuesday I’m going to hear “is Leo Hannan the guy?” By Wednesday somebody’s going to ask if Braylon Collier is the future of the receiver room. By Thursday Barstool is going to post Mansour walking into Notre Dame like he’s Tony Soprano. Stop it. Pump the brakes. Remove your foot from the gas pedal.

You’re yelling at imaginary people.

They become real by lunch.

Here is the part you are avoiding. The reason fans are excited is not because they think Grambling is Alabama. It is because the whole offseason was a circus. The hire was mocked nationally. People called him a YouTube coach. The first quarter got weird. And then the team settled down and actually looked like it had a plan. For this program, after the last few years, that matters.

Fine. It matters. There. Clip it. Dave says it matters. But I’m not doing the genius thing. I am not doing “Mansour saw what no one else saw” after one FCS game. I am especially not doing it when they gave up 165 rushing yards. They pitched a shutout and somehow I still had to watch Grambling run for 165 yards. That’s a very Michigan State way to win 45-0.

Option teams get weird rushing totals. You know that.

I also know Notre Dame is not going to send a handwritten apology before running into the C-gap. Wisconsin just put 50 on them and somehow Notre Dame still scares me, because wounded big brands are the worst. So forgive me if I’m not planning a parade after Grambling.

No one is planning a parade. People are saying it was fun.

Fun gets you hurt.

You are ridiculous.

I am experienced.

Hannan?

Good. There. Good. I liked him. I hated the fumble. I liked the response. I liked that he didn’t look like a kid who had been handed the keys to a spaceship. But I’m also old enough to remember that Milivojevic came in and went four-for-four. So if Hannan has a two-pick half against Eastern, don’t tell me the conversation is closed. It is never closed in college football. That’s why God invented callers.

That is the most honest thing you’ve said today.

My final take: good win, good signs, do not be stupid. Eastern Michigan next. If that game is annoying in the fourth quarter, I am going to be unbearable.